She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
