Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize