she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
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