I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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