how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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