Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
