Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
