I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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