TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
