I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize