You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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