DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
