hotel room ftw
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Randomize