I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
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