office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
