it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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