Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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