I molested 6 butterflies tonight
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
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