i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
