Sry I called you an 8
And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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