i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Sober January is a disaster.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
