problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
