I got chris browned last night
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
