so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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