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• (214): View more from Texas

  I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  She has a lazy eye!

  (317): View more from Indiana

  My other option is a hardwood floor

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.

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  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.

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  The 33 Worst Things Men Have Said While Hitting On Women

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you think the firemen will remember me?

  (315): View more from New York

  Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God

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• (+91): View more from India

  I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby

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