Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously

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  (281): I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously http://tfl.nu/rnuw
  Replies (9) Good night (718) Bad night (1142)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.

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  (440): Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know. http://tfl.nu/71w6
  Replies (25) Good night (11542) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.

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  (+61): Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme. http://tfl.nu/6yp3
  Replies (14) Good night (2845) Bad night (1344)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double

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  (604): she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double http://tfl.nu/55xg
  Replies (18) Good night (4936) Bad night (1196)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.

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  (973): He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird. http://tfl.nu/n9dq
  Replies (17) Good night (4925) Bad night (1309)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor

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  (250): You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor http://tfl.nu/35l1
  Replies (2) Good night (1934) Bad night (876)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?

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  (903): Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive? http://tfl.nu/hm3a
  Replies (2) Good night (2354) Bad night (935)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!

  (940): View more from Texas

  HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.

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  (940): My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!! (940): HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT. http://tfl.nu/347l
  Replies (8) Good night (2168) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...

  (718): View more from New York

  What do herpes have to do with anything?

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  (609): I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico... (718): What do herpes have to do with anything? http://tfl.nu/w2v0
  Replies (4) Good night (839) Bad night (1330)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.

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  (206): Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats. http://tfl.nu/azi3
  Replies (12) Good night (530) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing

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  (907): I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing http://tfl.nu/5qyn
  Replies (11) Good night (1023) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?

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  (562): Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream? http://tfl.nu/nras
  Replies (1) Good night (792) Bad night (322)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.

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  (781): Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it. http://tfl.nu/uzna
  Replies (1) Good night (812) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.

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  (202): Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time. http://tfl.nu/ulsc
  Replies (3) Good night (575) Bad night (1028)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.

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  (780): I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong. http://tfl.nu/brwn
  Replies (2) Good night (554) Bad night (817)

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