she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
