READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
tell me about the eggs
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize