at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
