I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize