And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
