We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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