Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
