tell your sister to shave her snatch
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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