idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
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The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
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You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!