Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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