No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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