Me too!
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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