with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
