Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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