wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
