OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
