physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
