Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize