definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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