and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
