I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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