this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
