i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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