Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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