Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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