so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
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I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
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I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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