you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
