It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
